Is it possible to have romance and kids?

One Thing I’m Totally Sure Of Is: Everyone wants to feel loved

One Thing I Am TOTALLY sure of is that ..

Everyone wants to be loved just as they are.

We don’t want to be loved, despite our less attractive bits.  We want to to be totally and unconditionally loved.  This is true of us all, from the poorest to the richest, from the kindest to the maniacs.

Ironically, a lot of our less attractive behaviour comes from this one truth, because our brain kind of mixes up what ‘Love’ is an what it feels like.

Let me do some science, (but don’t expect scientific language for me, and feel free to add it if you would like to).

This is how our brains work generally ….

  1. Something happened.  Hmmm, I wonder what I thought about it.  Yep, this is my view/perspective/judgment of it.  Right let’s store it under this category.
  2. Something else happened.  Hmmm, it’s a bit like the last thing, but not quite the same.  So let’s store it in the same place out of laziness because it’s sort of the same.
  3. Lots more things get stored in the same category.
  4. Several months later, something else hardly the same at all happens, but by then we’ve forgotten the first thing, so it appears to match the same category.

Get it?

So, a child child looking to feel more loved over a period of time can put these thoughts together: ‘I feel loved when my Mum gives me attention’ -> ‘When my mum looks at me she is giving me attention’ -> ‘Hmm, Mum is ignoring me, but if I do something naughty she will look at me and give me attention’ -> ‘Result, she shouted at me’!

Of course, there are other reasons for unpleasant or unsociable behaviour, after all some people just like being irritating etc, we don’t just want to be loved, we do want other things too which give us a pay off that we like.  But it’s always worth wondering what’s going on in your child’s head when they behave in a way which just doesn’t make sense.  Especially if the way that they react is quite extreme.  You’ll probably be able to ask them what it’s all about, if you wait until they have calmed down.

How do we make people feel loved?

So the next question is how on earth do we make people feel loved, because it’s not as easy at is seems?  I bet there are times that you’re loved ones don’t feel totally loved.  If you don’t believe me, ask them (I’m going to do another post about Curly Headed Boy soon, to show you that you aren’t the only one).

There are two sides to it:

  1. Really getting to know them so that you know what makes them tick, and what makes them feel cared for.
  2. Learning how to see them totally, and loving them just as they are.  It’s about aiming to love them totally including the ‘less attractive’ bits, rather than what we normally do, which is to love them despite those bits.

I can show you how to do understand what makes your loved ones tick (1) quite easily, and if you put a bit of effort in, then you can definitely do it.  Some of us naturally know what is important to our loved ones, but it’s much more likely that you don’t and just assumed that you did.

Loving people unconditionally (2) is more difficult, because it’s not about being infatuated/in love with them; it’s about unconditional love which is quite illusive.  I think that Mums often (but not always) feel this naturally for their children.  But eventually the stresses of life make it more and more difficult to love our children’s ‘good’ and ‘bad’ parts, without wishing there was less of the ‘bad’.  I learnt how to get to the point of totally someone or something by learning the Demartini Method from Dr John F Demartini (I’m one of the few Senior Certified facilitators globally).  I’ll post some blogs about it over the coming months in ways that will be really applicable to your lives; but to truly learn it, you really need to do a course, or go to a facilitator for a 1to1 session, it’s just one of those things that needs more than a blog post to learn in full.  There is a book if you are interested though, called ‘The Breakthrough Experience’.

So how to get to know someone better?

First find out more about them and their values/priorities, you’ll be surprised what you don’t know about your loved ones.  These questions will help and if you want more info then you can read Dr John F Demartini’s book ‘The Heart of Love’ where he shows the full Twelve Demartini Evaluation Method questions:

  • What do they tend to spend their time doing?  Why do they like it?
  • What do they like the house to be like?  Why?
  • What do they like to spend their money on? Why?
  • Who do they like being around.  Why?
  • Then try actually asking them!

What Makes Them Feel Loved?

I’ve found a book by a guy called Gary Chapman called ‘The 5 Love Languages’ to be very helpful with this on top of what I learnt about values from Demartini (he’s also written a pile of others and one for kids, but be warned he is very christian which might be off putting for some of you, and it shows up more in the other books).  He says that most people favour one or two of the five which are (I’ve translated them a bit):

  1. Compliments
  2. Quality Time/Conversation
  3. Gifts
  4. Acts of Service
  5. Physical Touch

The problem with these 5 options is that, if you don’t know your loved one very well, you could say the wrong things, buy the wrong things, do the wrong things, talk about the wrong things, and even touch them wrong!  That’s why it needs to be combined with the more practical general understanding from the first questions.  (If you want to see an example, I wrote a more specific post called ‘what to do if your wife won’t sleep with you‘).

So why am I writing about this?  Well someone popped me an email about their grand-daughter, and it was spookily similar to some problems that I’ve been having with Curly Headed Boy, but before I could launch into a blog post to answer it I needed to do some background stuff first … keep watching for the next post.

If you ever need some hints of ideas on how to do this, remember there is my question corner for anonymous questions/advice.

What makes a Man sexy?

I’m sure that if there was a 100% answer to this it would be worth millions, especially if it was just from a touch of the button, or from buying a gadget!

I’ve been reading up a lot recently about sex, it must be my mid-life crisis, just about to turn 42 thing!  It started with me finding a fascinating blog called ‘Married Men Sex Life‘ and having a few chats with it’s writer Athol Kay, and then reading his book.  I warn you, as a woman, and an independent type at that, it was a little shocking.  But I had to admit that a pile of what he said made a lot of sense, even if it meant that I rather uncomfortably realised that as a woman what turned me on was maybe a bit of a cliche.  The big northern grumpy one has read it too, and agrees with me that it’s a really good book.

I answered a question from Athol in my question corner for one of his readers, who was struggling even after Athol’s advice to improve his sex life with his wife, and I wrote a blog post about how to get more sex from your wife.

My post was all about knowing your wife, and what she enjoys; maybe presents, or talking, or compliments, or physical touch, or doing things for her.  But I’m beginning to think that maybe it’s a lot simpler than that, and that my post was more about how to get warm and cuddly sex from your wife (what Athol calls ‘love bond’).  But it wasn’t tackling the more ancient ‘Me man, you woman, we go well together so lets just do it’ kind of sex (Athol calls ‘lust/dopamine) and the attraction of a man with the traits of an Alpha male.

I suspect that what I wrote about, makes us feel more open to our men, and therefore that can lead to sex, because it means that we feel close and loved by them.  But I’m not sure that it actually makes them sexy.

In the daily mail a couple of days ago there was an article suggesting that equality has destroyed people’s sex lives, and I think that there is some truth in that.  We might be independent women, who want equality in our relationships and at work, but I suspect that a massively high percentage of us are still biologically programmed to react to the ‘Alpha’ male, i.e. the one who is confident enough to grab us, kiss us, and drag us off to bed.  (No, I’m not talking about any situation where it is obviously against our wishes).

So it is probably true that there are confusing signals out there for men, because in order to survive a busy modern life, we do need someone who keeps us safe, and we also like respect and equality (This is what Athol calls the Beta traits); however, our bodies are still hormonally programmed to react to the more basic need of a strong man for him to press the ‘sexy’ button in us.

Anyone who is in control in one place is going to want to be out of control somewhere else, I bet the majority of the guys who become ‘submissives’ in S&M are actually major big wigs at work.  No one is the boss everywhere, not even a control freak.  So it makes sense that as Mums who have to be so on the ball to keep life, the kids, work, housework, and all the chaos around us under control, that we would want a time where we aren’t in the driving seat.  With the added juggling that modern life demands of a Mum, maybe we need even more to feel that there is a time in our weeks when we don’t have to be the responsible one, or the one in control, or the boss.

At the same time, there is what Abraham Maslow called the ‘hierarchy of needs‘; which is a basic set of human needs that are important for us to feel that we are safe and secure and can focus on more than just survival.  Mums tend to be worried about lack of time, money and energy.  So if their husband does something that makes their energy levels worse, takes more time, or affects the financial security of the house, and they are going to be unimpressed with him.  Rather than making a man sexy or not sexy, this is really just about whether we want to be around him at all.

So I reckon that there are 3 levels to making a man more sexy to a woman, and a sensible man will mix and match them all at different times …

1) Looking after her basic needs; so that she is sure the family is safe and sound

Make sure she has some energy!  If she is exhausted or got PMT, then you need to look at what is most missing in her life and either help her with it or not make it worse.

This is normally lack of time, money or sleep and repetition of boring household chores that knackers her out.  (BTW, incase a really stupid man reads this I should point out, many women don’t want sex for weeks/months after just having a baby depending on the damage and sleep deprivation; nothing is going to fix that!).

2) Make her feel warm and cuddly; so she knows you love her

Make sure she feels loved, check out my post for how to find her ‘love button‘ and not miss opportunities.

You will need to spend a few hours working out what your wife loves, and then have to keep an eye on it incase her interests change, but it’s worth it for more sex right?

3) Remember, she’s a woman; and what she wants in the bedroom is a man

It’s a cliche, but there must be something in it, as it’s the standard recipe in every single Mills and Boon romance.  So remember that she’s a woman, who wants a big strong man to throw her over his shoulder, not a friend.

You just have to fake it until you make it.  Pretend to be confident.  Pretend you know what you are doing.  And go and read Athol’s book, it’s worth it!  (most importantly, read about the 10 second kiss!).

 

What do you think makes a man sexy, I would love to know?

p.s. hope you like the photo of ryan reynolds; I started with wolverine, but wordpress wanted to cut his head off, and it is a very pretty head ;o)

Weight Loss Tips For Mums

Weight Loss Tips No2: Are you really up for it?

So are you really up for losing weight?  

WHY?

If you are answering:

  • Because I should.
  • Because I keep complaining about it.
  • Because other people say I should.
  • Because I look fat.

Then to be honest you haven’t got much chance of losing weight and keeping it off.

If you are answering:

  • I’m not sure, but it seems like a good idea

Then I want you to go and get a cup of tea and a pen and paper (you must write this stuff down, because magic happens when you write) and make three lists for me.

  1. The People You Love (e.g. family, friends)
  2. What You Love Doing (e.g. playing with the kids)
  3. What You Love Getting (e.g. clothes, attention)

 

Now I want you to make another long, long, long, long list answering this question:

 

Why will getting HEALTHY, FIT and SLIMMER help all the people I love,

and help me with all the things I love to do or have?

If you write this list you are going to start to feel really motivated.

If you keep going after that you are going to get so enthusiastic that mountains couldn’t stop you from achieving it.

If you keep going even a little longer, you are going to suddenly feel it at your heart, and a couple of tears will appear in your eyes and you will KNOW without a certainty of a doubt why you are going to soon be feeling (most important) and looking fabulous.

Now for those of you who missed my free facebook webinar never fear, I have managed put it onto youtube:

If you find these tips helpful, feel free to sign up for my RSS feed or subscribe by email so that you don’t miss any, tell your mates, and join my facebook page.

A whirlwind of a week, would you like a second chance?

Wow, this week was a crazy week!  Children’s nappies leaked twice and whole beds and duvets needed washing, babies puked, I bumped my car (ouch!), and I daftly scheduled Little Dimples vaccinations.  In the meantime technology was not loving me, things kept going wrong and my computer was on a go slow.  I was only just ready for my Free Webinar on ‘Ensuring your children reach their potential’ a couple of hours beforehand.  But phew, I made it, and I thoroughly enjoyed it, so you can be expecting lots more Free Webinars in the future!  (I hope I hear a massive ‘yay’!).

Now, I’ve already been approached by a few Mums who missed the chance to attend the webinar; don’t worry guys, I was kind of expecting that, because we do have very busy lives as Mums.  So I have created you a special new page from which you can register to hear it.  Please do it this way, don’t try to sneak the URL for the recording from a mate, because then you will miss out on the FREE online course which helps you after the call!  Ignore the descriptions you may see on registering in gotowebinar, that’s now irrelevant as the webinar is over!

http://mummywhisperersecrets.com/missed-my-webinar-ensuring-children-reach-their-potential/

What would you like next?  Pop a comment below for your most ideal free webinar or what you find you struggle with the most, and you never know that might be what I pick.  If you don’t have any ideas, here are some of mine, what do you think of these?

  • Why looking after yourself and keeping your identity as a Mum is crucial – you might know this logically, but do you need a helping kick to do it?
  • How I tackled Curly Headed Boy’s problems with starting reception
  • Ideas on handling bullying

Looking forward to all your ideas!

A big fan of ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’, the way to people’s hearts

I’m a fan of ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’, in fact since having kids I’ve become a big fan of manners.  It’s not until you see a young 2-5yr old mimic an adults behaviour that you really realise how rude or uncaring or unattractive certain types of behaviour are.  Ironically, it’s not that I actually take umbrage at bad manners; as I totally understand that ‘manners’ are completely different depending on what country you live in, what culture you are from and what values your parents instilled in you.

The reason why ‘manners’ and understanding what they are means so much to me, is because relationships are the key, the reason for life.  They teach us about us, they teach us about the world, they help us to change our perspective on life, they helps us see both sides of the story.  (Yep, I am one of those people with the belief that there is more to life that just this bit, humour me, because it keeps me happy!).  I know that a few people like to go and sit on a mountain and meditate to evolve, but I honestly don’t believe that is a very practical method, maybe they just need a good holiday for a bit.  For people to open up to us, they need to feel that we are on their wavelength; which basically means we are behaving or talking in a way that appeals to their value set.

Curly Headed Boy likes people, he has always been a social animal, therefore it is important that he understands the basic core manners of social behaviour, plus eventually learns to suss out manners or different cultural behaviours and respect them as well.  In this way he will show the other people involved that he cares about them, because he is behaving thoughtfully, and he will get what he craves, which is popularity.  Fair enough, sometimes this has to be tempered, because being a ‘people pleaser’ won’t help him, so he will also sometimes need to stand his ground and make sure he’s not a walk over.

Unlike the generalisation of boys, Curly headed boy is actually pretty in touch with his feminine side, so he is sociable, creative and chatty.  But I have over the last 6 months realised that I need to work a little harder on the manners aspect.  It’s amazing how easy it is to forget to say ‘hello mummy, how was your day?’ before going straight into a complaint or demand.  It’s also amazing how easy it is to forget to say ‘hello’ and give a cuddle to someone who comes into the house frequently, like a loved one (a hint for us parents on valentines day!).  It’s also very easy to forget to say ‘goodbye, have a lovely day’ with a quick kiss when everyone is in a rush.

I remember how strict his last nursery was, when they made the children say ‘good afternoon’ when they left.  But now I see how important it is to teach them to mark the beginnings and endings of things, so that they are really present with what is going on in their lives.  As a work from home Mum it is often difficult to put up boundaries as to what I’m doing or which person I am, but this is another use for the basic manners of saying ‘hello’ or ‘goodbye’.  After 22yrs with the big hairy one, its easy for us to forget the simple things as well.

With Little Dimples, she already understands human behaviour amazingly at 1yr old, so I suspect she will pick up on the power of manners pretty early on.  But I am also aware of how easily she mimics things (have a very funny video to share with you next week!), so it’s a warning to me to behave as I expect her to.

So I’m a big fan of ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’.  What about you?  Have you become more or less of a stickler for manners since becoming a parent?  Do you remember to use manners when dealing with your kids and your partner?

This valentines day, remember to give your kids a hug when you pick them up from nursery or school and say ‘hello, how are you’, and then when your partner gets home, give them a hug too, even if they are grumpy from a tough day at work.

Oh, and if you fancy learning more about human behaviour, relationships and how to ensure your children reach their full potential, register for my webinar THIS THURSDAY http://www.MummyWhispererSecrets.com

To do list

What Will Cause The Most ‘Pain’ If Not Done By The End Of Today?

To do list
To do list

In ‘ye olden days’, i.e. 2 months ago before the arrival of ‘little dimples’, my second child, I used to ask myself what might seem a slightly dark question when sorting out my plan for work/life balance.

I would think about being elderly and sitting on my death bed, looking back over my life.  ‘What would I regret not doing?’.  Would I miss doing that piece of admin, writing that document, working with that client, or playing with my son.

In some cases, I really wanted to write, or the client session was going to be really interesting and couldn’t be at another time.  But in other cases, the sun would be out and it was definitely time to make a memory and go and have a picnic.

This would really help me to be clear on what I wanted to achieve, and how I wanted to do it.  I’m not the type to go pushing ahead with my business, and put the kids last.  It’s not wrong, it’s just not me, and most of all kids just want us to be ourselves.  I’m also not the type to not have another string to my bow; that is, I’d be a rubbish stay at home mum!

But now my life has changed, and is much more practical and much more short term.  My question is ‘What will cause me the most pain if I don’t get it done by the end of today?‘.  It helps me with the juggling act (which frankly I’m not doing well at), because ‘little pink’ could wake up at any moment and then demand attention for the rest of the day.

Today, I needed the washing dry, but I also needed to write, just quickly, so that I felt that feeling I love for a moment.  I’ve also made myself a long glass of squash and got some snacks ready, as I’m conscious that her milk demands are increasing.  Which also means sod any thought of a diet for another week!

If I get a chance I’ll phone the two mates who left me a voicemail or text.  Max is at nursery today, so I might even get a chance to interview a ‘Mother’s help’, but most of all I need a little peace and quiet after the easter holidays, when I made a couple of fatal mistakes; I’ll blog about them later in the week, but they are all about feeling unappreciated because you do a pile of stuff ‘for’ people and forgot to work out your compensation package ;o)

A great question, can be worth it’s weight in gold.  What questions help you?

Is It OK to threaten your toddler with popping their balloons?

I dont know the full news story, but I saw the Wright Stuff talking about a Mum who couldn’t get her 3yr old out of the park, so threatened to pop her balloon.  Apparently the daughter immediately got off the swing.  But the Mum was also seriously told off by other parents who said that she will have permanently scared her child’s life by doing it!

What do you think?  Would you walk up to a parent in a park and tell them off for their techniques?  Has someone done that to you?  Is it going too far to threaten to pop a balloon?

My answer is as always going to be based on common sense, and practicality, which is it depends on the child and the situation.

If that balloon was the most important thing in that child’s life and they valued it incredibly highly, then yes, it was probably quite a cruel suggestion, a bit like if I threatened to put spiderman in the bin.  However, if it was a fleeting attraction, and the child was fully aware that there are more balloons, then it was a just a sensible application of consequences and boundaries to the child; a bit like me threatening that there would be no 10 minutes of ‘strictly come dancing’ before bed!

I totally think that with kids ‘what comes around goes around’.  So bully them and treat them with disrespect, and expect them to do so back to you very quickly.  So whatever method you decide to use to get them to do something, you are best off being respectful.  BUT!  That doesn’t mean you can’t be forceful, and have clear boundaries.

I have no idea how the Mum in the park did the balloon popping threat.  However, if she had attempted to get her ‘little darling’ out of the park with normal methods like, “We need to leave the park in 5 mins”, followed up by “Time to leave”, and then when she was resistant “If we don’t leave the park now we will be <fill in consequence etc late, unable to do something etc>”.  Then I can totally see why she would then have resorted to an offer of a stronger consequence.  Plus it worked ;o)

If she was at her whits end, shouting at her ‘little darling’ and aggressively threatened to pop the balloon, without much attempt to find alternative means, then yes, this might not be the most ‘ideal’ option.  But none of us know whether she was sleep deprived, handling huge stresses at home, or generally just at the end of her tether.  I don’t know any Mum who hasn’t been there!  So no, it might not have been ‘ideal’, but heh, it was all she could come up with at that time.  From the perspective of ‘permanently damaging’ her daughter, then there will be some ramifications if she continued to behave like that for a long number of months.  But I’m not one for agreeing with ‘permanent damage’.  If I can work with people who were abused physically/sexually as children and quickly help them to move on, with great empowered lives, that have no ‘ruin’ in their past, then there is no reason ever for a child to be ‘permanently damaged’.  Don’t fall for our general tendency to victimise people for life in the moment in the UK, it’s really not the best option for these so called ‘victims’.

I’m quite surprised at the behaviour of the parents who tackled this mum in the park.  It’s either come from a genuine concern, in which case, good on them, because loads of us are parallised by being politically correct.  However, I suspect it came from a self-righteousness, and lack of empathy, which is a terrible shame.  As parents, we have a difficult enough job as it is (whilst also being joyful), without turning on each other.  Do you know what I can promise you about those parents?  If they were that enraged by it, I can be 100% sure that it was because it reminded them of something that they have done somewhere in life, or know they could do, and the reflection of someone else doing it, made them feel terribly guilty and hence lash out at this Mum.

I’m kind of in the middle road between the people who think that you should only ever ‘negotiate’ with a child and those who think that you should always rule the roost.

I’m a proponent for finding out the values of the people who are important in your life (I teach how to do it on my workshop and have blogged about it before), and then talking in their ‘language’.  Which could be termed ‘negotiating’, expect for the fact that I also underline the importance of any option working for both parties, whereas for some people ‘negotiating’ suggests that the children have the main control in the situation.  Like I said before, this is the most respectful way to deal with your kids (and anyone else for that matter).  HOWEVER!  All kids need boundaries.  So sometimes it is talking in their values and best interests to teach them that there are consequences for our actions.  If there are no boundaries then we get a pile of spoilt, demanding kids, who will struggle with adapting to ‘real life’ as they grow up.  (Obviously the boundaries need to be relevant to the child’s age and maturity).  With no boundaries, at the very worst we get a pile of kids with no financial sense, all wanting to become famous, probably bullying people left right and centre.  It can even get to the point that they have very little appreciation for what they get in life, so they either end up treating everyone in their lives like dirt, and becoming physically or emotionally destructive.  I saw an example of this in the park this week.  A little boy systematically spat at, kicked, pushed & called my little boy names, and his Mum did little about it.  He wasn’t a ‘contented’ child!  When later one of her group pointed out to her the behaviour and she therefore tackled it, her child mixed with the other children much more happily.  He actually needed and wanted the guidance on boundaries.  (I have another blog enroute about bullying, so you’ll find out how come I didn’t step in soon!).

Anyway, I’m off to pick up my ‘little darling’ now from nursery, so gotta end there.  I’d love to know what do you think?

The 6 Step Flexible Family Solution

I have created the 6 step Flexible Family Solution as an adaptable process that I can teach to Mums to deal with their unique families and ever changing daily challenges.

There are 6 steps:

1) Step 1 is for the Mum to learn what her needs are

2) Step 2 is to learn what her Family’s needs are

3) Step 3 is to clear the brain noise from the Mum’s head

4) Step 4 is to add a Reality Check

5) Step 5 is a Dash of Knowledge.

6) Step 6 is to learn to Appreciate life as it is

Step 1 – The Mum’s Needs/Values

The reason why it is so important for a Mum to understand herself and what makes her tick, is because that is the only way that she can be sure of maintaining a balance in her life and keeping herself going as well as the family.  When we are really tired from a tough time, there is only a short amount of time available to pick ourselves up.  So if we know what makes us tick, then we can find something to re-energise ourselves quickly.  Also, you can use that knowledge to push yourself to do the things you hate doing or motivate you to do what you would like to do, by linking what you know you love, to doing the tasks.  This improves our energy levels, because hating something, makes it a lot harder to achieve!  Whereas, if you have linked it to something you love, you’ll be much more up for it.  Most importantly, if you know what makes you tick, you’ll know how to balance your needs & the family’s needs, rather than putting the family first all the time (which tends to backfire big-time).

Step 2 – The Family’s Needs

This helps you to understand the difference between what they ‘Need’ for their basic survival versus ‘Want’, which is unnecessary.  Plus that being ‘Caring’ is not just doing things for people, but doing things that they would actually like you to do!  You’ll be able to negotiate more effectively with your family about those tricky things that you need them to do, as you’ll have learnt how to speak in their ‘language’, rather than your own, which could be entirely foreign to them.  Plus you’ll learn how to tackle those Worry and To Do Lists.

Step 3 – Clear Out The Brain Noise

Brain noise is all the fear, guilt, worry, shame, blame which fills up our brains and makes it difficult to think straight.  You learn how to tackle those very dangerous ‘Should’s about what life should be like and we should be like and break those fantasies that make us miserable.  We also look at tackling the beginnings of depression or feeling down (although for anyone in the depths of full blown PND, more assistance would be required).

Step 4 – Reality Check

It’s important to learn to compare yourself and your family fairly with others, rather than thinking that you are worse or better.  Our home circumstances might not be what society considers as ‘ideal’, but we can make them work for us, rather than punish ourselves for the way that it is.

Step 5 – Knowledge

Finishing off is a dash of knowledge because a little bit of knowledge is always important to give you some ideas for tackling the challenges and because you now understand your family & yourself, you can be much clearer on which options work for you.

Step 6 – Appreciate Life

It’s old fashioned, but counting our blessings has been proved to be great for our health and our day to day well being.  Learning to appreciate life as it is, adds tremendous relief and enjoyment to our lives.

We put all 6 steps in a bowl and mix in with a simple decision making process, and you have a reliable, achievable and sustainable way of tackling the daily challenges that Mums face and making those complicated decisions that we often feel so overwhelmed by.

Hello world!

So, I’ve been thinking about starting a blog for ages.  A blog to show that even someone whose called ‘The Mummy Whisperer’, is going to have good and bad ways.  That there is no perfect way, and that there are no mistakes.  Whilst offering the odd useful insight for other Mums around the globe.

So what got me suddenly going?  Getting invited out to dinner!  I don’t get out much, as I tend to be too much focussed on work/my family.  However, this was an offer to good to ignore, and it turned out to be a really inspiring and potential creating event.  I’ll let you know more about it in the next couple of days!

Check out my About page for a bit more background into where I’m from.