Mental Health Awareness week – how I handle the depression that comes with Lyme disease and Fibromyalgia

What an amazingly inspiring and informative week this #MentalHealthAwareness week is!

I thought I would share how I handle the crushing depression, general anxiety and crippling brain fog that I get (or used to get) with my Lyme Disease and Fibromyalgia.

Watch this video for a much more detailed description of what it feels like and how I handle it, but here is a quick summary ….

  • Crushing depression – is Vitamin B – get your Dr to check your vitamin and minerals if yours feels like the one I describe.
  • Anxiety – get moving – my local beginners dance class is key to handling this
  • Brain fog – Omega 3, 6 & 9 oils and Circulation are key to improving this.  Plus tap dancing or playing the piano to improve the synapses in my brain.

But most of all it’s about accepting who I am and working with it, instead of against myself – I am who I am, and that is someone who will always need to look after myself, even once I am symptom free.

I have created my own system to deal with the ups and downs of life called ‘Heal your life’ which incorporates journalling, affirmations and meditation – very simple, but deeply powerful and empowering.  I incorporate it in my 6 month membership program ‘Be healthy, fit and slim’ because I believe that health is the priority and self-care and emotional health are key to that.  Remember, if you support your body, it can then support you in the ups and downs of life.

Any questions, please feel free to to pop into my facebook group #MUMMYWHISPERER Tips – I’m always happy to help.

Accept who you are and the pace of change that suits you!

Last week I spoke to so many Mums who were being really harsh on themselves, that I wanted to chat to you about being more accepting of who you are – it’s certainly something I’ve had to do over the past year.

Some big news for me – and why it’s OK if your progress is slow!

Last weekend I made a huge breakthrough in my fitness, and managed something I never thought I’d be able to do again frankly.

I’m just so chuffed, so I wanted to encourage any of you who are judging your progress in health, fitness, emotional health, finances or business to just keep going.  It doesn’t matter if our progress is slow.  For me it’s not an option to not be healthier than ever before – so really when I’m 90 looking back, I won’t care that it took me a couple of extra years.  The same goes for anything.

I’ve managed it by tuning into my body, so that I could work out when to push and when to pull back, and what it would love to do.  Which leads me onto ….

Embrace who you are

Stop telling yourself that there is something about you that is wrong.

It won’t help to try to ignore or cut that part of you off and guilt just creates a tonne of brain noise, that means you can’t find a way to make a new choice or work around it.

Instead work with it:

– So maybe you are limited physically and have to pace like me – but perhaps that is just opening up your eyes to new ways of being, like doing yoga instead of marathon running? My progress has been unbelievably slow, but to be able to run, for however short a time was something I never thought I’d be able to do!

– Perhaps you have anxiety – to be honest, you might always be that kind of person, so the coping mechanisms that you put in place right now, you will always need. Like going to an exercise class to physically move the anxiety out of your body or have quiet time regularly – whatever it is, that’s OK.

– Perhaps there are things in your past that make you less sure of yourself – that’s fine, you might just need a constant friend or coach for a while to help build you back up. Know yourself and accept it – find a way to do it.

– Perhaps you’ve had depression – that doesn’t make you weak or wrong you know, it’s just an experience and part of who you are. So the fact that you might need certain things to keep you going or to avoid certain scenarios for self care is fine.

– Perhaps you are overweight? Doesn’t mean you aren’t beautiful! Doesn’t mean you aren’t an amazing person! You could even be very fit! Feeling guilty about it, will just make listening to your body and what’s going on harder. Losing weight is not about cutting out the person who loves food, it’s just about persuading them to love a slightly different type and maybe a little less. It’s not about removing all the pleasure in your life (not my way anyway!), because that’s not sustainable. It’s about becoming MORE of who you are, not less.

I’m not saying we can’t make a choice to change some of our habits.

But it’s about working WITH who you are, not trying to force yourself to be someone different – your neighbour, or that other Mum who ‘seems’ to have her shit together, or that business woman who gives the impression she is more successful than you, or your friend who is skinnier than you.

Anyone who joins any of my programs will become MORE of who they are in their hearts and learn to adapt what I teach them to suit them perfectly. Wether it’s my mastermind groups, or law of attraction courses or my 6 month membership to lose weight – it’s all about empowering you to be able to love yourself more and take over the reigns in your own life.

Just wanted to let you all know that you are perfect and don’t try to be anyone else ?

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For anyone looking to lose weight, the doors to my 6 month membership program ‘Be healthy, fit and slim’ are now open and there are 2 great limited number offers:

1) Join with a friend ???and share the bill, making it only £7.50 a week! I love accountability – so this will give you a big accountability boost!

2) Join on your own ??? and get 1 month’s free Deluxe membership upgrade for only £15 per week – so that you have daily text and voice access to me and a 1to1 to boost your start.

I’ve updated my website to include videos that go into LOADS of depth about the program, you even get to see inside the content:
https://mummywhisperer.com/be-healthy-course/
(But message me before booking, for special links to purchase the offers)

If you’d like to get a feel for how I work, join my group #MUMMYWHISPERER Tips and check out the 3 day [reboot] detox – it’s great for giving you a chance to stop and rethink some of your habits (and boosting your weight loss if you need it).

Any questions just message, I’m happy to answer.

Time For Change

 

So how are you feeling – is life going well, or are you looking for some changes this year?  If so, great – this year is going to be a good year for successful changes, I can feel it in my bones!

But there are a few things that you can do to make sure that you set the best goals and keep focussed on them during the year.  So I’ve created a free 8 day course for you to download to get you started with a bang!

It daily tips covering 3 areas:

Decluttering – because we need to get rid of the old to bring in the new
Coaching – to help you set great goals that means something to you
Health – because our body is the engine that helps us achieve those goals!

There are also 2 meditations – one to help you let go and one to help boost your new intention.

And a bonus masterclass on why goals & resolutions often fail and how to use the Law of Attraction to increase your success.

To download the course, just pop to this page on my main site and subscribe and it will be sent to you by email automatically.

I recommend that you also join my free facebook group and keep in touch with how you are doing!

My dream this year is to consistently touch the lives of 20,000 mums and help lift them up, so that they feel better.

I’ll be focussing on improving my health (I am SO much better), my kids and the Mummy Whisperer – I’ve got tonnes of news to tell you!

Good luck and may all your dreams come true this year – because we all deserve for our dreams to come true!

 

 

#ProjectSeptemberUpgrade – Taking steps towards your dream life

So September is nearly upon us – this is a wonderful time for new year resolutions, as we have started school in September for so many years, that it is almost written in our DNA that it’s time to ‘move up’.

Here is my facebook live giving you tips on how to upgrade your life, and there is a quick summary below for you as well.

One of the important parts of the Law of Attraction that people often forget whilst visualising ferrari’s is to ACT.  What’s often just as important is to start ‘acting as if’.  So in your new dream life with the amazing relationship or better financial set up or wonderful health, how would you be acting?  I’m not saying to start spending money now that you don’t have.  But rich people tend to manage and budget their money well (those that keep it anyway).  People in happy relationships tend to have a good relationship with themselves.  And so on …

Now I often talk about ‘upgrading’ your life for example your knicker drawer.  But recently I had a revelation when someone asked me to look at what I was ‘tolerating’ in my life and ‘what was not ok’!  Why was this so different?  Because I have a tendency to avoid conflict and ignore what I’m scared of.

When I bravely started to make my list (50-200 is recommended) – which is very long having juggled a business, young kids and an illness for so long – I started to feel a big shift.

There are 3 types of things:
1) The simple ones you can start to get going on quickly.
2) The ones that cost time and money that need to be planned and budgeted for.
3) The ones that involve other people – that can feel heavy to organise and sort out.

Once I started looking at (1); which involved an adaptor plug, new dish brush etc, I suddenly found that a huge (3) happened effortlessly and didn’t cost anywhere near as much of (2) as I expected.  There is LOADs of positive change happening.

Now originally I stared on this route because I am up for an award (subtle plug!) and realised that I needed to get all my ducks in a row – hence photos, new website, clarity on my strategy & plans etc.  It’s been a big journey for me and an even bigger one now that I’m looking more deeply at what I was ignoring.

So please do come and join in!
Like my facebook page and join my free facebook group ‘Create your dream life with the mummywhisperer‘ for tips, photos and ideas all the away through September.  There will be a free ‘Upgrade your money story’ course as well.

Oooh and I’d love a vote, pretty please!  Just pop ‘MummyWhisperer’ in the box here and I’ll love you forever <3

Readers Votes

Introduction to the Law of Attraction and how it works for Mums

As you know I’m passionate about the Law of Attraction.  I feel it is empowering for us Mums.

We can so often feel as though our lives are restricted.  Our timetable is set by the kids, there are a lot of financial needs, and relationships can become trickier.

Since going more deeply into this simple Law, I have been able to use it to lift myself out of a downward stress spiral, tackle challenges with the kids, and apply it to my health and business.

Here is a quick video introduction where I explain more deeply what it is and why it has helped me.

Put simply the Law is that:

Thought + Emotion + Action => Our Reality

Psychologically you can see how despite their best intentions, the way that a person thinks and behaves affects their whole life.

But the LOA is more than that.  It is saying that our vibration is also key to the people and circumstances that we attract.  This is the key to more dramatic changes in our lives and creating long lasting dream lives.

To Learn More

To learn more about the LOA I recommend liking my facebook page (set notifications to first, so that you don’t miss posts) and join my free facebook group ‘Create your dream life with the Mummywhisperer’.  Also watch ‘The Secret’ – which is often free on youtube – but remember that just focusing on a Ferrari is not getting you a Ferrari, there is more to it.

Remember, one of the keys to improving the quality of our lives is to love ourselves more.  My FREE 6 day email course is still available to subscribe to, until Friday 20th April.  Click here to receive it into your inbox and be added on my newsletter email list.

If you have already heard of the LOA, and want to apply it to a difficult challenge you are facing or a goal that you have struggled to achieve.  Then strongly consider my ‘Happier Mums Use The Law Of Attraction‘ 6 week online course.  It is ‘evergreen’, so once in, you get constant access to the material and get to reattend whenever I rerun it.  There are 3 FREE Goal clarity sessions on offer to the first people who sign up (worth £60) and doors close on Saturday 21st April.

I’m running a FREE masterclass on the LOA on Thursday 19th April at 8pm.  (I am not running it as a facebook live, you need to register).  If you have struggled with the LOA, this is for you.  You may also then be interested in getting my 6 week ‘Happier mums’ course for free, plus a free clarity call and signing up for my 6 month mastermind group ‘Manifesting Mums‘, where I can support you more in achieving your goals (if you are interested in this, we have a free exploration call to check that it is right for you).

To Register for my free masterclass and be added to my newsletter, subscribe here

 

 

Any questions, just ask!

** Remember: You Deserve Your Dream Life **

The key to a happy, healthy life: Love yourself more

A few months ago I ran a free course in my facebook group ‘Create your dream life with the mummywhisperer‘ on how to love yourself more.  I’ve turned it into an easy to use and keep 6 day free email course, which you can subscribe to before Friday 20th April!

It’s simple, powerful and easy to fit into your life as a mum.  Plus it will make a huge difference, because being kinder to yourself and learning to love yourself more is the key to a happy, healthy and wealthy life.

Check out my video explaining it here and subscribe <HERE>.  Please share if you know anyone who needs to be kinder to themselves or appreciate themselves more.

Why Business is Spiritual and 10 Tips to finding clients on facebook!

So I know some wonderful women running their own businesses, but for some reason they are deeply intimidated by the words: Business.  Marketing.  Sales.  Finance.  Money.

I’m in here to tell you that business is a deeply spiritual business!

Money isn’t bad, it’s just a way of performing a transaction.  It magnifies who you are, yes.  But it’s not bad.  If you are worried about money, it’s unlikely to turn you into a monster!

Business isn’t bad either.  Please don’t judge those people who have become cynical, money grabbing and cut throat – until you are there, it’s difficult to understand how difficult it can be out there.  My last 5 years has been deeply shocking, and it’s taken a lot to keep my heart clear and not just give in to their kind of behaviour.

Marketing is just letting people know you are available.

Sales is just getting to know people and helping them to make the right choice.

Customer service is about you learning to manage your boundaries.

It’s all about personal development!

Have a look at my video below where I talk about my experiences and why business is really spiritual:

 

One of the things I’ve noticed is that many small businesses or self-employed people don’t make sure that their clients can find them.  So here are a list of things you can do, which are really simple:

  1. If you know nothing about facebook, please read this post
  2. Make sure you link your website and facebook page to your about page of your PERSONAL profile
  3. Make sure that the website and facebook page on your personal profile are set to be seen by everyone/public in your privacy settings
  4. Share your business page sporadically (not irritatingly) on your personal profile, so that your friends see what you are doing and can support you.
  5. Make sure your business page has all the most relevant information set up:
    1. About information and story (more than 1 line!)
    2. Include your website if you have one
    3. Services
    4. Shop (if you have products to sell)
    5. Go into your page settings and turn off anything you don’t need e.g. for me community and shop
  6. Link your groups to your facebook page so people can find them easily
  7. Use your name/business name in your facebook groups and name them so it’s obvious what is going on in them
  8. Use offers – they show up in a special place people scroll through
  9. Use events – they also show up in notifications
  10. Add a newsletter subscription if you have one

Once you’ve got the basics set up and you have started to be comfortable, then I recommend finding someone to help.  I’m not at the stage where I want to pay someone to do my social media for me, so instead I’ve joined a membership group where Inga Deksne keeps us up to date and encourages us in our strategies.  If you are older and really, really befuddled by all this, then Lisa Nichols would be ideal to hold your hand more.

 

Facebook – beginners information for your business

I’m still seeing it constantly – small business owners, struggling to know the basics of Facebook.  So here are the things that you MUST know to get started.  From here, just take it steady and slow – you can’t learn it all in 5 minutes, just do it bit by bit.

Profile

Your profile is your PERSONAL page.

Facebook doesn’t like you having a fake one for your business, as that is a way around it’s rules.  You can create a new profile that is more business orientated, but why bother honestly?  If you’ve been ‘misbehaving’ on Facebook, stop, because it will affect your business.  Nothing on social media is secret!  You can change the privacy of each post, but I don’t have time for that.

Some people don’t like to show anything about their business to their friends.  Why?  Friends aren’t as supportive sometimes as you might like them to be.  But if they have a choice of using another company or you, wouldn’t it be better if they use you?

I’m shocked how many business owners haven’t posted anything on their timeline about their business.

But, be discerning – don’t over do it either, otherwise people will get bored and tune out or unfollow you.

Be careful to set your privacy settings.  I only share my information with friends, but my profile is public.  See the picture below for the location of the privacy settings.

Page

This is your business page.  It is where you post stuff about your business and go live.  Then you share it to your profile or group if relevant.

You can invite friends to like your page – I do this about once every 6 months.

You can create events on your page – this is helpful if you run courses or do workshops.

Create a pinned post at the top of your page, with your key piece of information or event.  For example when I’m running a free course, the information will be pinned there, so that people don’t get confused when seeing lots of other posts about it without the join up info.

Fill in the about information – check contact details, location and description.  Include everything you do – otherwise they may never find out.

 

Group

A group is a community, where you can interact with your clients more.  This may or may not be relevant to your business to create.  For instance, it might not be useful for a clothes shop, but would be for a coach.

Create a post with the ‘rules’ for how your group will run and pin it, so that it is always displayed at the top of the group.  E.g. can other people post about their business?

Add a description about yourself and the group, so that people who join know what it is about – so many people don’t do this and lose community members because of it.

Set the privacy settings – normally to ‘closed’ – so that no one outside can see what is written in there.

Link it to your page.

Do NOT add people into your group without asking them – this really upsets them.

Do NOT tag everyone in the group overtime you post – this really upsets them!

Some people choose particular days or times of the day to interact in their groups and reply to comments, as otherwise it can be overwhelming to reply straight away to loads of comments through out the day.

Other Groups

Read the description.  Read the pinned post.  Follow the rules.

Interact with others and be helpful before you post your stuff.

Don’t put an ‘F’ or ‘.’ as a comment, so that you can see other peoples comments.  Instead click on the 3 dots in the top right hand corner and ‘Turn on notifications for the post’ (see photo above).

Please check the files for information that has been created especially for you – if you are in a group for information, the most likely thing is that FAQ’s have been written up.

When asking a question go to the [search] function first and see if it has already been asked.  How much effort do you think someone will put into asking your about the latest lash product for instance, if someone else asked the same 3hrs earlier?

Be polite – say please and thank you.

Don’t read it if you don’t want to.

STEP AWAY – you are being judged on your behaviour in a group, there is no need to argue or convince other people that you are right.

Nothing is ever completely private or safe – don’t post if there would be a problem if someone copied your post and shared it elsewhere.  There are nasty people on Facebook who will do that.  Don’t be one of those people!

Personal Friends

As I’m running a business I’m careful on Facebook.  If someone is annoying I ‘unfollow’ them.  I hardly ever unfriend or block.  I only unfriend when I find people have been basically watching me for a year, but never interacted.

Time Line

Your timeline is your personal updates on what is going on in facebook land.  First come your memories from before, then the page updates from any pages that you set notifications to ‘first’.  Then there will be updates from friends.  NOT all friends – just the ones you’ve been interacting with recently.

Facebook Adverts

It is possible to get people to like your page and set notifications to first so they always see your posts.  But generally other wise you will only reach a certain number of people with your page.

Inevitably you will need to do an advert.  The easiest thing is to ‘Boost’ your post.  But eventually you will find better results from the ‘Ads Manager’ (see below, and get proper advice on how to do this).

Generally

The most important thing is to remember, that just because it’s online doesn’t mean you don’t have to work at creating relationships.  Think of your posts on social media as a conversation – are you being boring?  Are you only posting about what you want (more clients), or are you also sharing information, being interesting and being helpful with no agenda?

If you are selling a network marketing product, please don’t use the technique of being vague about what you do and not mentioning the company.  It is unwise, only attracts people who don’t know what you are doing (so are a bit daft), and makes you look bad.  The rest of us do know what you are trying to do!

Hacks & Viruses

It’s unwise to get involved in chain messages or chain Facebook posts – they just fill up timelines with repetition and are like a virus because they take up space.

It’s unlikely the message saying ‘THIS IS TRUE’, or asking you to share and copy to your timeline to warn everyone about something catastrophic is real.  Check Snopes.com for updates on hoaxes.

Don’t click on links from people you don’t know.

Don’t add a Facebook friend again when you are already friends with them – it’s likely not them.

The cute girl/soldier who just added you, who has no mutual friends to you, is likely not a real person.

To Learn More

Things change constantly in Facebook land and always will.  We never like their updates, and it can be a pain to keep up, but they like to keep improving.  They are a business, it is not bad that they need to make money.

I recommend Inge Deksne – she has a great membership program where you pay monthly.  She supports you to get onto social media more, especially Facebook, and runs online ‘cafe’s’ where you can ask questions.  She can do all the research for you and keep up to date – there is a lot to it, and she will save you time, effort and tears.

How Journalling Helped Me Turn My Year Around

I have become a HUGE fan of journalling this year!  I started in June and it has really helped me to reduce stress, improve my Lyme disease, enjoy being with the kids more and make important business changes.

Come and join me in my Facebook group ‘Create your dream life with the mummy whisperer’ for more regular tips and my free ‘Time for Change’ course.

Here is a quick video I did about to encourage you to use it this year if you need to make a big change:

Why?

Writing stuff down is pretty magic.  It empties the mind of stresses and often helps discover a solution more easily.

It gives perspective on a problem and helps to see if things are not as bad as you think.  Or even highlights when something is worse and you’ve been letting it go on to long.

The notes help me really integrate healing/personal development I do and make sure I learn new stuff fully.

By doing a 3 monthly review I discover that I tend to have achieved much more than I thought (I tend to be quite hard on myself), and it helps me make a change to problems in the next 3 months.

How it works

As you can see, my journal is really simple.

I started with one page per day, but it’s more like 2-4 pages per day now.  The key things that have helped me are:

At the beginning I make a note of what I want to:

  1. Monitor – this tends to be things I forget to do that are good for me, like dog walking.
  2. Treatment routine – my current treatment routine, so that I can monitor what does and doesn’t work.
  3. What I want to achieve over the next 3 months
    1. at home
    2. for the Mummy Whisperer
    3. and my salon.

At the end I review the 3 months (or year if it’s December) and do a summary of what happened and then review what did and didn’t work.  This will give me my focus for the next 3 months.

For each day I will highlight in the margin important things that happened e.g going somewhere special with the kids or something happening at work, and some options that help me track my health e.g. exercise.

Most days I’ll make notes from a meditation, do some personal development or read something that I want to make notes on.  Those notes go on the plain pages, so that I can also track when I was studying different things.  At the end of the 3 months I particularly review these, as I find it helps make sure I’ve really learnt/integrated new info.

I use a gold highlighter to underline important pages that I want to be able to find again, and sometimes little labels if it’s notes I need for work.  I LOVE STATIONARY!

I’m going to enhance my notes section for this year and use it for To do’s, memories and doodles of things I want to create/manifest in my life.  So it’s going to be more colourful, hence definitely needing more stationary 😉

 

If you are looking to make a change and aren’t sure where to start, I can’t recommend journalling enough.  It doesn’t have to be complicated, a plain notebook is perfect, just add a margin to highlight key points and put the date in.

Let me know what you think and remember to come into my Facebook group for helpful online courses.

 

Look after yourself every day!

I’ve been chatting to lots of mums recently about taking care of ourselves.  Often they’ll say something like ‘oh yes, I always go to Zumba/Yoga’ every week.  One thing!

Here’s my vlog about why we need to do a little something for ourselves every day.  Why our vibe is so important and why WE are so important – we are the heart of the family and the heart of the community.  If you don’t take care of yourself and think you are important, why will anyone else respect you?

Come and join my Facebook group ‘Create your dream life with the Mummy Whisperer‘ and I’m going to post every Sun night/Mon morning with a thread that we can use to be accountable to do something for ourselves every day.