Why my body suddenly crashes


This is how my body works …..

“Right then, we have a target, all hands on deck we have a target”

“We estimate that this project will take <xyz> amount of energy over <abc> number of days: initiate gradual send out of energy per day”

“Oh shit, we estimated wrong”

“Initiate borrow of energy from ‘Bank of Energy’ to reach end of target”

“Yay target reached!”

“Warning, warning, insufficient energy creation ability to pay back energy debt, the bank is pulling the plug”

“Warning, warning, the plug is being pulled, the plug is being pulled”


Cue my body literally feeling like someone let the energy plug out, differing degrees of pain and numerous other symptoms slumped on sofa for <efg> no of days.  And no, I couldn’t just keep going anyway.

Targets so far were – a 2 month project working until midnight every night to work out the necessary price changes at Espiritu.  It was the right choice, and I felt confident and sure that I’d been as fair as possible to everyone – clients, staff and the business.  I was so amazed how my body did, and really thought I’d stopped in time.  However 5 days later at the end of June I was hit by the worst pay back I’ve ever experienced and those 2 months cost me nearly 4 months (read my post about silent illness here).

I started to feel human again 3 weeks ago.  There was a project (a client Christmas party and some new recruits).  I worked hard (until 11pm this time, not midnight).  It was really successful and the new girls are wonderful.  I crashed for 4 days.

So I took it easy this week.  But I spent too long at the salon yesterday, and suddenly the plug was pulled.

Do I get a warning?

Not really, and sometimes I’m too committed to the project with little option (yes I delegate and make sure we do as few projects as possible, but it’s a new business and there are always unexpected eventualities).  But the pain during the Christmas party was a pretty good hint there was going to be payback.  Yesterday I think that it was the over riding urge to get home, which I listened to – but I still felt guilty when leaving work.

The problem is that my estimations are all wrong.  Then once committed to a project, the determination inside of me will always get me to the end.

This must be why people get sick on holiday – so they get sick once they are done.

I need to learn how to leave enough space for ‘new business type unexpected crap‘ to show up, whilst fitting in projects and not using my [determination of an ox] button to ensure successful completion.  Oh and don’t forget the ‘has 2 young children‘ factor.

If I find the answer, I’ll let you know.

In the meantime, do as I say, don’t do as I do, because I’m really not a good example!  Take care of yourselves, give yourself time to fill up your energy savings.

p.s. I have found something that has been helpful with the pain & fibro sleep issues.  I’ll blog in a week or so.

p.p.s The rheumatologist doesn’t think I have Fibro – hmmmm – I’m awaiting blood tests and a referral to the neurologist.

p.p.p.s Why did I write a blog post if I’m tired – tbh I type quick and it feels good to do something very ‘me’ – I love writing.

The face of silent illnesses

This is the face of illness ……


It doesn’t look particularly ill does it?

Honestly I don’t mind. If I looked like I felt, it would be pretty catastrophic, and at least I don’t have that to worry about. I don’t need lots of sympathy all the time either. Although, I suppose it might be a helpful reminder to people that I’m not up to scratch.

I also have a big habit of ‘putting a good face on’ – one of my weaknesses/strengths who knows!

To those who know me well, there are dark rings under my eyes, a slight tightness to . . . → Read More: The face of silent illnesses

How to invest in yourself!

So back at Radio Verulam today with the Gorgeous Danny Smith and I was inspired to chat about ‘investments’ by Curly Headed Boy.

It’s spring time, maybe you need a fresh look at your life and a bit of an overhaul?

The question is how to invest in yourself?

Money Saving.


We are quite strict that even from pocket money, our kids have to put something aside. It’s just so that it becomes second nature to them and eventually when they start to earn money, they naturally expect to be putting a minimum of 10% away. Otherwise, his head will be automatically . . . → Read More: How to invest in yourself!

How, why and what on earth is ‘Loving yourself’?

Is it possible to have romance and kids?

I was on the radio tonight with the ‘Gorgeous Danny Smith’ on his Drivetime show on Radio Verulam (you can listen again for a week here – monday 5.30-6pm), talking about ‘Self Love’. It’s a bit cliched maybe, but also really important, and something I’ve been thinking about and wishing a few of my friends would practice more this month. Why Bother?

A hug

First off, I need to explain to you why it is so important to you and to the ones you care for, and your success that you love yourself. 1) Healthy relationships – when you don’t love . . . → Read More: How, why and what on earth is ‘Loving yourself’?

New Life Resolutions

By now most of you guys will have started and stopped your New Year Resolutions. Never fear; that’s perfectly normal!

January is a time for reflection. March and September are the time for new resolutions.

But I was thinking after seeing a funny YouTube video, getting a bit down about the state of the world, and after a team meeting at Espiritu, what 3 resolutions would make the biggest difference to this world of ours or more importantly mine 😉

So I thought I’d chat about it with the ‘Gorgeous Danny Smith’ on his Drivetime show on Radio Verulam this month. (You can . . . → Read More: New Life Resolutions

Why Pampering Is The Best Present You Can Give

Pampering – it’s one of the best presents you can give YOURSELF or your loved ones!

It might sound a bit ridiculous for the owner of a Hair & Beauty Salon and Spa to say this: But I hadn’t understand HOW important it is until recently.

Now Danny Smith at Radio Verulam is a big fan of a pamper, so I thought I’d chat with him about it, about how under-estimated it is. People think of it as a treat – whereas, I’m beginning to understand that it’s essential.

If you missed us, you can listen again for a . . . → Read More: Why Pampering Is The Best Present You Can Give

What to do if your job or business don’t seem to be doing well?

Fur Monster

So I’m back with the gorgeous Danny Smith on Radio Verulam – thank goodness he keeps asking me in, otherwise I’d never get around to blogging.

Check out all my previous posts in the run up to Christmas if you need tips on what to buy, how to afford it or how to deal with the stress of it.

This time I thought I’d look at a slightly different side to Christmas; the stress of someone in a job that isn’t going well, or a business that needs a big improvement, especially when you know that ‘Christmas is coming’, along with a pile . . . → Read More: What to do if your job or business don’t seem to be doing well?

Top Tips For Getting A Job Or Keeping A Job

Look at things

Last month I chatted through top tips for starting a business or finding a business, so this month the the gorgeous Danny Smith on Radio Verulam I thought I’d talk through jobs for those that I put off starting a business 😉 I know that with Christmas coming up there will be lots of job opportunities, and then afterwards, some lucky people will get the chance to stay, so I thought that tips put together from 13 years of working in IT, 15 years as a therapist and a year as an employer might help!

(Please do let me know if they help – I’d . . . → Read More: Top Tips For Getting A Job Or Keeping A Job

How to start your own business?

Wow it’s been a while! Sorry about that – this business malarky is taking up a lot of my time. But as I’m popping back in to speak to Danny Smith on his Drivetime show for Radio Verulam, I thought ‘maybe I should start blogging about what I’m doing’?

I saw a mum on Facebook the other day asking for advice on starting a business, so I thought that having worked for myself for the past 15years, I’d give some tips on starting your own business.

There are lots of different types of business. For some reason I feel that Espiritu . . . → Read More: How to start your own business?

Do you feel unappreciated?

I’ve come across a few people feeling unappreciated recently, so I thought I’d give some tips on how to deal with it. As poor old Danny Smith on Radio Verulam is considered one of St Albans’ hidden treasures, I thought I’d go through them on his Drive time show.

Fancy listening to our dulcet tones? You can listen again here.

Do you feel unappreciated? Is it at work, at home with the kids or with your friends/partner?

The good news about feeling unappreciated is that it can be dealt with pretty easily ……


Tip 1: Have you told anyone?

To . . . → Read More: Do you feel unappreciated?